Hey, I'm TJ!

I am a father of 3 and a husband of 1.

Years ago my life was completely different. I worked in a fast-paced career in the power industry. I had an amazing house, a beautiful wife, a beautiful new baby boy, traveled to many incredible places, and ate really good food. I worked hard to provide for my family. Life was perfect—at least from the outside.

Inside the walls of our home, it was a different story. The atmosphere was often tense and chilling. I could sense that something was wrong. No matter how hard I tried, it felt like what I was doing was never enough. The more I thought about this, the harder I worked in a meager attempt to find what was missing. “Maybe if I get a promotion or travel more, we will be happy,” I would rationalize. But nothing worked for long.

I remember being genuinely confused. What am I doing wrong? I had checked all the boxes that I was aware of to make a great life for my family. Yet, under the surface, my wife and I were discontent, and the space between us felt like a million miles.

I was exhausted.

The harder I tried to make a great life, the busier I got and the more disconnected I became—from my wife, my friends, from God, and from the man I was and desired to be.

What I did not realize back then was that beneath the picture-perfect mask that I wore, there was so much brokenness and pain that I had no clue how to address—or with whom to address it.

Long story short, God took me on a journey through the fire to draw out the parts of me that needed to be healed and refined so that I could show up as the best version of myself for others. He did this through His powerful love, but also through the help of one man in my life who showed me love, gave me perspective, and offered hope when I could not see it.

He was there for me when I was at the end of myself when the fires seemed too hot.

He helped me see every single crisis in life as an opportunity instead of a failure.

What has resulted is a man (me) who loves with his whole heart and has now dedicated his life to helping other men heal and change.

I am called to be a companion through the fire for others.

Since then, my wife and I have restored our connection and the atmosphere in our home has completely shifted. I went back to school and obtained my Master of arts in Counselling and have worked with couples and individuals as a clinical counselor for the last number of years.

My life is completely different now, but I could NOT do it alone. I owe so much to the wisdom of my coach, who was relentlessly present through the fire.

At the end of my life, I am convinced that the only thing that will matter is how well I loved. And the truth is, we cannot love others well if our own life is not in order.

I am grateful for the men who trust me to have an influence in their lives. I have compiled years of mistakes and learning into wisdom in the area of connection and relationships so that the journey doesn’t have to take so long for others—basically, when I work with others, they get the last 20 years of experience without having to wait 20 years!

So, you ready for the journey? Let’s go.